Slack finishing and a highly questionable decision by the referee Stuart Attwell left Everton exposed to the sucker-punch duly delivered late in the game by Bobby de Cordova-Reid.

The Blues started brightly, with Neal Maupay dragging a shot narrowly wide. The little Frenchman is having a shite time of it lately, and snatched at another pair of chances in the half when someone with a bit more confidence might have done better. Sadly, it comes as no surprise whatsoever then that he’s ended up with tons of grief on social media. 

The world’s always been full of cunts. It’s just they all have computers now.

Maupay highlighted one particularly grim message, which apparently wasn’t posted by an Evertonian, but you only had to see grown men losing their shit in the comments after an ace little film about the Finch Farm groundsmen ensuring there’s only 97 red flowers in the wild bed at the training ground, to know that some people just need another fucking hobby for their mental wellbeing.

It’s like people want a Pride of Britain medal because their sports team have been slow making some transfers. 

Talking of strikers though, when we were linked to Paris Saint-Germain’s Hugo Ekitike, did you think his surname sounded like Sam Allardyce reaching for a label to describe a brand of Spanish football that he has no time for?  

Anyway, it’s actually getting to a point where you see the ‘player abused’ headline, open the story and then sort of shrug when you realise that it’s online. Because the internet is full of disappointing maggots.

Abdoulaye Doucoure should have scored or played in James Garner when clear through, but his low shot clipped Bernd Leno’s foot and spun just wide. 

Attwell’s moment in the spotlight came when Leno came over the top of James Tarkowski and dropped the ball as he landed. Michael Keane shot into the empty net only for the plant pot to blow his whistle despite no sign of a foul. 

If that’s at Anfield or Old Trafford he’s giving the goal or at least consulting VAR, regardless of the technicalities of when he can or can’t. 

What will we get? Maybe the new, improved Howard Webb, resplendent in his Tom Ford suit, pair of Lanvins and silver-fox beard, steepling his fingers meditatively and mansplaining in that deliberate Henry Winter style how we essentially need to pipe the fuck down?

100% he’s given his stylist a mood board featuring Fred Sralex, Ari Gold off Entourage and just a dash of Jason Statham in Crank 2. 

Raul Jimenez hit the post for the visitors in the second half, while Nathan Patterson smashed a shot against the crossbar with the goal more or less at his mercy after Leno spilled a long-range effort from Iwobi.

Marco Silva’s second half substitutes worked a dream. Sulky Serb Aleksander Mitrovic was the big concern, but it was Andreas Perreira who created the most problems. On 81 minutes his intelligent run and low cross set up Cordoba-Reid to slide in and win the game.

Tarkowski, a permanent danger at the far post, headed – you guessed it – narrowly wide, as the Toffees pressed for an equaliser, but to no avail.

We’ve apparently signed Jack Harrison on loan from Leeds United. He always looked decent enough for them so, like, yeah man. Cool.