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What a sordid little encounter this is.

‘So, question for Bill Beaumont’s team. You’ve given away a stupid free-kick about 25 yards out, your goalkeeper’s left an enormous gap at the near post and James Ward-Prowse is set to take it. What happens next?’

So here we are again. The royal blue boa constrictor is slowly, inexorably crushing the life out of everyone who has even a passing affection for the club.

Did you always think that James Ward-Prowse’s dad was the Green Cross Man?