Gerard Deulofeu
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First of all, an apology. Last week, while musing on how Roberto Martinez would cope with the absence of Leighton Baines, we deduced that Bryan Oviedo’s absence from the derby squad meant that the Everton manager doesn’t rate him. In fact, the term ‘a bit shit’ was used. Well, the Costa Rican started against Stoke…
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As we vainly looked for a decent ending to the preview we fell back on the tried and trusted ‘should be a cracker’, a statement that managed to be simultaneously trite and completely misguided. This game, between two sides who could have moved into second place with all three points, was essentially a load of…
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Ola, bien venue and welcome to This Is Not Football, especially if you have arrived via Newsnow for the very first time – the eagle-eyed among you may have spotted a couple of tasteful, unobtrusive logos dotted here and there. If you are one of what we like to call ‘newbies’ you might appreciate bit…
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What did we say about this game, Roy? You said don’t be a soft get and balls it up like the last fella and ruin our best chance of winning a trophy. No we never Roy, you big fat bastard, we said these London cup games have a habit of bringing you down to earth.…
This is not football 
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